The Girl With The dragon Tattoo... lets start this off right, I've seen three new movies in as many weeks, Sherlock Holmes, Mission Impossible, and now this and only this has driven me to the point where I think I should write about it, if just to sort out my jumbled thoughts on the whole affair.
Starting chronologically, the intro credit sequence was absolute artistic brilliance, dark, oily, and sporting more techno bondage and torture than one could or at least should put in the first five minutes of a film, or so I thought. Not only that but it was set to a remake of Led Zeppelin's the Immigrant Song (not sure who by but forgive me for not caring enough to find out). From there we move to a scene in front of a courthouse, our main character, or at least one of them is a reporter who has recently been charged with libel, now (again forgive me for forgetting the characters name, but at the very least I can tell you it was Daniel Craig) Mike (*Mikael Blomkvist*) we'll call him is currently chasing his life down the proverbial shitter, having lost his life savings and his reputation because he didn't have enough evidence to substantiate a claim against some corporate bigwig. We then cut to the intro scene for Mara Rooney's character, (again some swedish adaptation of a name I won't even bother to recall) (*Lisbeth Salander*) she apparently works for as a private investigator, using her considerable talents as a hacker and stalker to sneak into peoples lives and houses to gather information for the higghest bidder. Anywho Mara's character is apparently "different" which means she's been raised socially awkward, she has more piercings and tattoos than I would want to locate and she might be slightly insane. So she just finished investigating Craig's character for the former owner of the company that "built Sweden" of course in parenthesis, his name is Henrik Vanger (the only one I remember, and played by Christopher Plumber) and his family is a little... well corrupt. This is where the already thick plot turns to molasses and if you haven't had your brain food you'll get lost. short story goes as follows (follow along now); 1. Fucked up family comprised of Nazis, murders, rapists, and the like 2. Accident in town, distracts family from the fact one child is missing 3. Child is missing presumably dead, body is never found even after extensive searches of the grounds and surrounding areas 4. Although they say she's dead Henrik hasn't given up hope and has hired Mike to solve the mystery, all the while more and more unfortunate events pile up one our protagonists making life a serious bitch. Get it? Yeah me either.
So it goes without saying that there's more to the plot than that, seriously if you want more read the book or go watch the bleeding movie, its time for my overall opinions on more than which scarf to wear. So, cinematography: excellent, the locals are brilliants, most likely shot on location in Sweden, and I never got the feeling there was an angle we were missing. Plot: bloody and thick, just the way I like my girls. Music: excellent, apparently it was by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross, the dream team responsible for many a rainy day at my house. It used a lot of emphasis notes, many mid range extended tones marking certain situations and I would say it was as complex as the movie itself. Casting: excellent I mean I'm still not sure why Daniel Craig agreed to play this role, but then again why was he in Cowboys and Aliens? And as for Mara Rooney, could someone please help me decide whether she is actually hot or those torture scenes where just tickling my inner sociopath.
If you haven't figured it out yet I haven't read the novel, or any of the series for that matter, for some reason I had it in my head that these were some teen drama novels not raunchy tales of murder and anal rape, that being said I'm not entirely sure I would like to read them now. I mean I've been sitting here for a good hour now trying to figure out whether the movie was worth eight bucks or not and I'm not entirely sure I'll figure it out. Its just one of those movies that somehow manages to lull you into a sense of security then destroy all the happy feelings you were expecting to have. The ending in particular was horrible for this, it should have ended when they found the girl, simple, happy, done, but no it went on to more espionage and foul play and then ended with Daniel Craig breaking the heart of the girl you had come to have actual empathetic feelings for. Daniel Craig I know you didn't write this part but fuck you, seriously, you should feel horrible for what your character did... actually now that I've written that I feel kind of bad myself you had no say in it for sure but man, you need to choke the screen writer or who ever adapted the book to film cause I'm not sure I'm going to get over how fucking dark and depressing this movie really was. Seriously I almost unwittingly took my mother with me to see this film, bad enough I had to share and armrest and a bag of popcorn with my father as Mara Rooney was screaming and being chained to a bed.
Overall, the darkness of this film worked for the intro, and managed to hold back for about half an hour, then the sexual harassment kicked in and this movie did things I usually keep locked up in my basement. But it had its ups, funny moments even, but I think myself and the theater full of middle aged couples were all laughing to try and convince ourselves we weren't like the characters on screen. So for the money I would say its worth watching, if you have a night and a bottle of wine to waste pondering whether Mara Rooney is hot or not... Oh and for future reference, no anal rape please. Cheers.
It's that time of year folks, break out those stockings and christmas carol books and spend some time with your loved ones this christmastime, and who's more loved than those 2 loveable stoners, Harold and Kumar, who decided to take you along on their wintery hijinks this year.
A Very Harold And Kumar 3D Christmas takes place roughly 6 years after the duo's Guantanamo Bay adventure and my how things have changed since then, Kumar is about the same, still living in the same apartment (albeit with a new roomate) and still smoking pot at every opportunity. Harold on the other hand has transformed himself into a successful (non-high) businessman with a wife, who's trying to start a family.
Upon receiving a mysterious package adressed to Harold, despite Kumar and him not exchanging any sort of communication since Harold moved out 2 years prior, he decides to drop the package off at his new place on his way to a party his new roomate Adrian is attending so he can take the virginity of a girl he's been chatting up on the internet. Once they arrive at Harold's, Kumar drops the package on the front step and starts to leave, Harold however spots him and invites him in where he opens the package and in the box contains a huge joint. Kumar lights it and then Harold throws it out the window because they don't smoke in the house, but wind blows it back in and it burns down the christmas tree that Harold's wife, Maria's father (played by the always frightening and imposing Danny Trejo) brought all the way from Mexico because he grew it, and he loves christmas so everything must be perfect.
Harold insists on handling the tree situation himself and calls his new friend Todd to help him out, Todd reserves the last tree in the state, and everything seems to be fine until Kumar drives past the tree farm and sees the tree that was reserved and offers triple for the tree, so he can give it to his buddy Harold. Unfortunetly that gets wrecked too after they crash and the tree kinda blows up. Have no fear however as this is a Harold and Kumar movie afterall, there is adventure to be had. So they end up making it to the party where Adrian's internet girlfriend, Mary, turns out to be the daughter of a mobster, and a very angry mobster at that when he walks in while Mary is trying to get Harold undressed.
So of course now they must find a tree, all the while being chased by a russion mobster and his lackeys. Have no fear, they have friends to help them, Rosenberg, Goldstein and of course NPH all make appearances and do whatever they can to help their buddies.
Now full disclosure here, I did not see this movie in 3D, in fact I don't watch any movies in 3D anymore because I feel that fad has ran it's course, I'm pretty sure Resident Evil 4 was the last movie I had seen in 3D. However while watching the film you can tell there isn't much to be offered by the 3D, in fact it seems they make fun of 3D movies more than anything, so really what you're paying extra for is to see how ridiculous it is to pay an extra $3.00 for the 3D experience.
While we're being honest here, I wasn't a huge fan of the first 2 movies in the franchise. I thought the first one was good for what it was a random stoner comedy, good for a watch every couple years or so. The second one I didn't enjoy at all, it was what all the other stoner comedies were but on a lower level. This one, I'm not sure if it's the christmas spirit, but I think this was the best one of the 3. I felt like in this one we see a softer side to both characters, Kumar struggling with the loss of his best friend and the break-up/pregnancy of Vanessa and Harold trying to balance family life and a social life, all the while keeping everything safe. It's because of this that the whole movie seems a little more, dare I say, "deeper."
It's been a few years since we've been graced with a good christmas movie, so unless you hate puppies and unicorns, you really have no reason not to see this movie. Oh and while we're on the subject of Christmas I've decided you can all pitch in and get me a waffle bot. Thanks in advance. - Conscious
I've finally found time to dust those DVD's off that have been sitting on the shelf for a couple weeks, I opted to start off with a little bit of Canadian grindhouse cinema...
Hobo With A Shotgun came to be after Robert Rodriguez and SXSW started a contest to make a "fake" Grindhouse movie trailer and they would make a legit movie out of the best one, similar to the "fake" Machete trailer at the beginning of Tarantino and Rodriguez Grindhouse double bill project that became a Hollywood film. In the end this trailer was enough to get a movie made after being crowned the winner of the contest.
The premise for this film is simple, you see there is this hobo (played by Rutger Hauer) and he gets a hold of this shotgun... Okay I suppose it's a little more complex than that, but barely so. The hobo arrives in town and notices it's occupied by pimps, prostitutes, coke addicted bum fight entrepreneurs and Santa Claus impersinating child molesters. This doesn't sit well with our homeless hero and after window shopping for a lawnmower (so he can start a grass cutting company to make something of himself, of course) he witness's 3 robbers try to strong arm rob the store by threatning beautiful and innocent shoppers, thus forcing the hobo to act, with a vengeance, grabbing a shotgun and shooting the 3 robbers.
No one really cares too much about the death of the robbers, however latter on that night when he saves a prostitute (who claims to be a teacher) from a dirty cop who was trying to get a bj by using force and not paying.the nightwalker for her services. So safe to say the hobo feels it necessary to introduce him to his shotgun, and I can assure you together they had a blast. So after saving the girl, they begin an unlikely friendship together. Someone however is not a fan of the hobo and his friend and that's Drake, the clean cut evil crime boss that runs the town along with his 2 sons, Slick and Ivan. Drake makes it his business to have the hobo brought down offering up rewards of cash, coke and girls for his head.
After all is said and done, Hobo With A Shotgun is a rather fun romp through Scum City. It's espescially fun if you're a Canadian, everywhere you look, you see a Candian icon; even Strombo shows his face! Being a grindhouse movie however if you aren't a fan of gore and buckets and buckets and even more buckets of blood this movie might not be for you. As far as the story goes, well I've touched on this already, it's not terribly smart, but it doesn't have to be. The title of the film is a joke, which tells you, the viewer, to not look too far into this.
It's a gleeful, gory mess of a movie, and providing you don't have a weak stomach, you should be able to enjoy this film, as far as Grindhouse fare goes this is on the upside of them, if not near the top. However as far as exploitation thrillers (they are not the same thing FYI!) this is middle of the pack, so if this sounds like your type of movie fare then by all means do yourself a favour and watch it. If you're on the fence, watch it anyway so at least you can make an opinion one way or the otherand when you do, let me know, I love hearing your thoughts.
This one is a little late coming but I’ve been swamped with college, work, blogging, drinking, and obvious new playthroughs. So here it is Resistance 3.
So as many of you will know the Resistance series has been around since the beginning of time, well since the PS3 was released at least. From the start we were immersed in the heroic story of a lone American soldier fighting alone against a horde of alien mutants hell bent of terraforming the earth and converting all its populace. I won’t bore you with the details but the first two games were really quite something, Resistance Fall of Man (1) was renowned in my home for being the first choice for split screen play on my new system, in fact I think I racked up enough hours in that game to contest my time on Modern Warfare. The second resistance game took the franchise a little further, bringing back the protagonist Nathan Hale, but this time he is part of an elite team of Chimera virus immunes like Hale, called the Sentinels. Resistance 2 took us across the United States on a crash course for trouble all the while Hale’s condition worsened and the team were slowly killed off, until at the very end of the game (SPOILER ALERT) Hale finally loses his humanity and is put down execution style by his last remaining teammate Joseph Capelli. Now Joe is the last person I thought would end up starring in their own game as he was a complete douche throughout the campaign, but being the only one still alive I guess Insomniac didn’t have that many options.
Anywho Joe Capelli, having slowed the chimera invasion and killed
humanities savior attempts to live a normal live after the events of the second
game. He settles down, gets married, has a kid, and lives in a small town
called Haven. The game starts up with us in the tunnels under the ruins of
Haven, we are called to a makeshift war room were battle plans are being drawn,
see a Chimeran patrol has stumbled onto their little home and Joe is sent
(after picking up his starter weapons) to check it out and reinforce the
garrison. So we sneak through the tunnels and eventually up into the old
bowling alley, from there someone’s head gets ripped off and shit gets real,
after that things get a little hazy. Something about some new breed of chimera
with new and improved weak spots, glowing yellow for your shooting pleasure and
a terraforming floating island ship thingy heading towards the town. Anywho dr.
Malikov from the first two games shows up and crashes the alien burning party
taking Joe away from his family and on a reckless hike across the country to
New York city where a large chimeran tower is apparently opening a wormhole to
the Chimeran home world…
That’s more than enough story to keep us going, the plot is a little
thicker than I portray it but overall I was pleased with how they bridged the
series, although I was kind of depressed after Malikov gets killed in a very
brutal fashion. Speaking of brutal this game seems to add a bit more gore to
it, attempting to spice things up with a little blood, and a few exploding
skulls. Also the character they chose to replace him is a little lack luster
and disappears halfway through the game only to be heard from again in hidden
journals and audio diaries. Yes like all games the resistance series has always
had collectables, being mostly dossiers on weapons and characters, audio
diaries kept by survivors living their last moments, and the odd hidden easter
egg. Although if you are the type of
person who cares not for exploring the levels for these hidden gems, they
really don’t do much for the story and aren’t required for any missions, they
just enhance the story and provide you with a little more information in case
you are the inquisitive type who can’t take the time to read the wiki or the
books.
So, gameplay, I was happy they brought back the health bar, although
there is still a red screen when you get hurt. Like all games there are
directional properties to the raspberry jam that spreads across your screen,
and most of the time the direction that it displays isn’t where the enemies are
and more than once I found myself turning away and exposing myself to a fanged
monstrosity sitting just outside my vision laughing at the whimsical control
settings. Speaking of settings I was perturbed by the motion blur at high
sensitivity levels, and even though I had the X and Y levels set to the highest
possible speed I was still turning like an asthmatic green horn. That being
said the controls are intuitive, and comfortingly common, mimicking that of
most modern shooters. Also making a comeback is the weapon carry system of the
first game, where every weapon you pick up stays with you throughout the game
so you will always be prepared for any situation. The second game annoyed most
old school players by allowing you a certain amount of space in your
character’s pack to carry weapons, and the first game although allowing you to
carry them all included so many weapons you barely had time to try them out
before something new and useless came along. But I digress the weapon system is
back and that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside and its not just the whiskey.
Weapons, it’s a good topic for this series, throughout the first two
games there were more weapons than I could hope to remember but here there a
few classic guns with maybe five or so new ones, that really the franchise
could’ve done without. New to the game is the ammo counting system, a series of
bars at the bottom of the screen decreasing in size until you can no longer
fire your weapon, I was impressed by the addition of ammo counters inside many
of the games scopes, being mostly the sniper and auger, but also the addition
of a sort of holographic sight with many of the weapons that always had a sort
of lack luster iron sight. Also new to single player is the ability to earn XP
with weapons and unlock upgrades based on your experience, this adds a whole
new level of gameplay, encouraging you to move past your normal weapon set and
try the new guns, also if you’re a trophy whore like myself you’ll need to get
your entire inventory to level three to see that shiny award.
So game mechanics and such, overall impressed besides the aforementioned
motion blur/sensitivity problem, although in a couple cases the game did glitch
up and I’m not entirely sure why. The graphics are as much as I could ask for,
nothing new but a little prettier in place. Particle physics don’t really come
into play here as the game seems almost devoid of weather or other
distractions. Low points I noticed would definitely be the ladder climbing
animations, very clunky and often hindered by having to wait for a certain old
man to work his way up one level. Also decreasing the reading level of this
game is the addition of the over used critical location system that seems so
important these days. No longer do we just pour bullets and laser fire into an
enemy we can barely see the top of, no now there are armor plates that glow
orange and yellow that tell you where to shoot. Chock that up as the dumbing
down of mainstream video games.
The game itself is very linear, but not to the point of being a dungeon
crawler, you have no options as to where to go until later in the game when you
may have an option of going into a tunnel or being the target of multiple
snipers and a dropship armed to the exhaust ports. The objectives are usually
very simple but can get frustrating if you don’t pay attention to every vent
and power conduit you pass. Other annoyances include the exception of a mini
map and objective markers, half the time I played I spent walking around
looking for a marker on my screen telling me which giant robot I had to kill to
progress the storyline.
The multiplayer is a step up from the first’s death match and on par
with the campaign style of the second. But its split screen where the game
loses some points, the second player is dubbed “John” Joe’s brother that has no
dialogue and isn’t mentioned in the story at all. Both players have the same
weapons being as how as soon as one picks it up the other magically finds it in
his hands, also if you are the lone wolf type good luck finding your own path
as you will be teleported to your wandering companions location as soon as the
game decides it wants to shit on you.
Long time followers of the franchise will be happy with the inclusion of
classic enemies and guns, but may also feel let down by the dumbing down of the
gameplay and exclusion of what seemed like franchise defining weapons,
mechanics, and characters. Overall this game was good, with split screen
capabilities and a multiplayer to rival that of the second game. Those just
picking up a Resistance game for the first time will quickly be brought up to
scratch and have no trouble, as the game plays like many other FPS’ of today.
That being said the game is nothing special, simply another squeeze on the
udders of Insomniac’s cash cow. But damn that milk is tasty.
At this writing this little blog of ours is sitting at 235 views, so I figured I'd do an entry to push us past 250. So if you're reading this, thank you for caring about us and what we write, if you aren't reading this, you must be a wizard, on to the review...
Rabbit Hole tells the story of a young couple whose lives start unravelling after they lose their 4 year old son Danny. In the film Nicole Kidman and Aaron Eckhart play the aforementioned couple in this gripping drama about life, death and how to deal with both, based upon the Pulitzer winning play of the same name.
The film begins with the couple mourning the death of their 4 year old son who was killed after being struck by a car driven by a teenager after running out into traffic chasing after his dog. Each parent takes a very different stance when it comes to mourning however which leads to troubles in their relationship, not only with others, but with each other.
Eckhart's character chooses to hold on to the memory of their son by keeping old clothes and belongings of him, as well as his room the exact same way it was, all the while trying to get his wife to agree to trying for another child.
Kidman's character on the ther hand is not so submissive with the suggestions of her husband, especially the notion of having sex. She also wants to get rid of all her son's clothes, and gets presented with the perfect opportunity to do so that when she discovers her younger sister Izzy is expecting her first child. Her family tells Kidman that it's innapropriate and Izzy even let's her sister know that if she has a boy she doesn't want to see him running around in Danny's old clothes because it'll bring back too many painful memories.
The couple also start going to a group for parents that have lost their children, Kidman resents everything about it whereas Eckhart finds it helpful. After a while Kidman decides to stop going leaving Eckhart flying solo where instead of going to the group he starts hanging out with a friend from group (played by Sandra Oh) acting childish together whether it's going to the arcade or smoking pot in the car. Kidman however isn't acting much better however as she starts meeting secretly with the driver of the car that struck her son and flipping out on her mother for comparing her loss to that of her mother when she lost her then 30 year old son.
This movie was all I could have hoped for and more. I expected a story that wouldn't be all that spectacular with great acting considering all the press Kidman got and given Eckhart's terrific track record. The acting did not dissapoint as the dialogue between the characters was always fiery and passionate which made it a pleasure to see. The story was the surprise as I expected a more downer story given the plot but some of the scenes were rather pleasent especially the ones revolving around Nicole Kidman and the comic book "Rabbit Hole"
I would highly recommend this movie to be watched. It can be seen at anytime, movie night with your family (providing the family is all 13+), date night or relaxing alone on a sunday night at home. The acting was as advertised with the story keeping you entertained enough to bridge the gaps between the scenes of beauty mined from self-depressive behaviour from the two leads just trying to move on from tragedy without forgetting their pain of the life they can't leave behind.
Once again I realize I've been slacking off with the reviews but to my credit, I've actually watched movies during this time. I just haven't been able to get to a computer to write about them... As evidence by my 15 unread e-mails stemming from Friday I haven't had time for and deemed unimportant. So before I e-mail complaints, and financial departments on with a review...
It's almost Halloween! And you know what that means!?! My yearly movie that I deem to be my "Halloween movie". Now to be my Halloween movie it doesn't have to be a horror movie or really even scary, it just has to have some sort of element that seems Halloween-ish, it can be zombies, kids trick-or-treating or a crazy alien that devours you and then replicates your cells. Enter The Thing.
The Thing, is a prequel to John Carpenter's 1982 classic that goes by the same title. Which itself is a remake of a 1951 film entitled "The Thing From Another World" often referred to, however, as "The Thing".
This prequel centers in on the alien specimen before it gets to Kurt Russell, hence the tagline "It's not human. Yet." Aside from being grammatically incorrect, it's about all you need to know about this film. It takes place during winter 1982 at a scientific research station in Antartica. After a group of Norwegian scientists discover an alien creature and what appears to be a ship deep in the bowels of the Antartic ice. After the discovery they contact Dr. Sander Halverson a so-called "expert" who travels to Antartica to see the discovery but not before his research assistant Adam Goodman, invites a friend, Dr. Kate Lloyd, an american paleontologist invited to help identify the possible alien specimen.
Upon arrival they discover the creature frozen in a block of ice that they elect to remove from the ice as they assume it had died 100,000 years ago when it's believed the alien aircraft originally crashed on earth. So after cutting the ice around it they transport the block of ice back and place it in the research station where Dr. Halverson decides to take a tissue sample from the creature much to the shagrin of Dr. Kate Lloyd and we see the first real friction between the characters. After a couple of hours of thawing the creature busts out of the ice and he does so with a vengeance, where he begins to pick off and copy the research station residents. Will it ever be stopped?
Now "The Thing" is classified as a horror film, although it's not your usual slash-and-gore kind of horror that you generally see in Hollywood's makeover of classic horror films no matter where they fall on the R.P.S. scale (Remake, Prequel, Sequel) as it generally erred more so to the Thriller side, perhaps by fiscal constraints considering it's relatively small 38 million budget, for comparisons sake the recently released Dream House, a horror movie that takes place almost entirely in one space had a 50 million dollar budget. So 38 isn't a whole lot to go around for slash and gore when you need to make an alien aircraft, and all those ice vehicles and helicopters they used.
They spent next to no time on character development outside of Dr. Lloyd, with the other characters, you had just enough information on them to either feel bad when they died, feel good that they did die or loved watching them handle those flamethrowers. It's espescially hard to make a horror movie nowadays in a frigid climate considering we're so used to seeing half naked girls getting killed mid-orgasm that it's odd not to see, but in this film it's good that you don't because that just wouldn't work in Antartica. So kudos to the director for not slutting up the characters, including my future wife Ramona Flowers (Still the best movie of 2010 FYI). The visuals were passable at best, probably a mistake for not filming in digital when there's so much CGI in the film to make it look more even, however when no CGI was on the screen it was absolutely stunning as I have long been a fan of movies filmed with a good ol' 35MM, and thus made the mountainous scenes all that much more better.
Overall, this movie isn't spectacular, in fact it's barely even memorable. But it's a lot of fun to watch about once every year or so (maybe even on Halloween) and if you're a fan of the recent R.P.S.'s then you should be more than happy with this film, regardless of critics thinking every classic shouldn't be touched with a 20 foot pole.
Welcome to the beautiful Banoi Island Resort, grab a drink and head on over to the beach or grab some friends and take a canoe trip down one of our picturesque jungle rivers. We’re glad you chose us please help yourself to a complimentary zombie... or an island full.
First off lets an objective look at the characters. There are four playable characters and more NPC’s than you can fit in a meat grinder. Before you get your hopes up I meant it when I said there are only four playable characters, just four, no customization regarding name, facial features, classes, gender, anything, in fact all you get to choose is where you place skill points when you level up. It seemed they also cut some corners with the NPC’s, all they had the time to edit it seems is the facial features, remember Oblivion where even the old ladies had the body of a twenty year old model? You’ll get a lot of that here. There are a couple NPC's that they spend a little more render time on, most importantly the leaders of the survivor groups, one of which saved you in the prologue and a survivor who will later follow you through the game acting as a portable storage unit. The backstories for your characters are pretty bleak and useless as they are nothing more than a two minute narrated sob story, and create next to no connection with the player and influence barely anything in the game. While we’re on characters lets take a little more in depth look, theres the blunt weapon specialist; who just happens to be black and a failing freestyle rapper, the ranged damage dealer; who happens to be an ex cop with a daddy complex, the throwing weapon specialist; a white football player who can’t hold his liquor; and last but certainly least is the sharp weapon specialist an undercover Asian investigator , anyone want sushi with your racial stereotypes?
So if you read that you now know there are roughly three types of weapons, blunt, sharp, and ranged. Blunt weapons are the easiest to find and in fact your first weapon is a great example, a wooden paddle (thank you sir may I have another?), I would say that blunt weapons are the easiest to find as every broomstick and piece of wood flooring you feel like ripping out of a zombie classifies as blunt. Its what I call the Dead Island complex: the state of mind where you think that anything heavier than a dust pan is a weapon. Sharp weapons range from the lowly kitchen knife to the high horse katana that will elude your inventory for the majority of the game. Ranged weapons encompass every weapon, as you can throw everything you find at a zombie, but along the way there are a few specialized types. Grenades play a prominent role as nearly every survivor shanty you stumble upon has a pyro waiting to make molotovs, actual grenades will appear later in the game and cause all kinds of explosive fun. If you’re lucky you’ll find a gun early in the story line, if not then wait till act two and three consecutively and you’ll have your pick of pistols, assault rifles, and shotguns, but be wary ammunition is priceless and more often than not you’ll find your magazines dry and become a brain buffet. One thing I was definitely a fan of was the modding, every now and then you’ll be rewarded with a weapon mod blueprint and from there you skip over to a repair table and strap some random (so it seems) items onto your weapons for various effects. Effects range from additional force to an elemental chance ranging from electric to toxic and incendiary.
The combat in this game can make or break the experience, I mean sure the graphics are pretty and you may find you have multiple zombie hotties following you around but when they forget your money and you have to show them who’s boss you need to be able to survive. There are two types of combat controls, digital and analog, digital being your standard FPS hack and slash and all that shiny stuff, analog is a more immersive style and requires you to violently swing your analog sticks until you smash your controller on the wall. So now we’ve gotten past my broken controller I can explain how I think the combat works. Every weapon has attributes that deal numerical damage to the enemies, taken as hit points and displayed onscreen, thats all fine and dandy but you still need to factor in weapon condition as the more you use the weapon it will degrade and eventually become useless. Any mods also factor into the math and weapons also have a “force” attribute, that basically means your sledgehammer is going to knock a zombie on its ass faster than your kitchen knife. Obviously thats not all I mean thats a weak equation to all us geeks, so weapons also have a critical chance and most enemies have a critical hit location that may or may not be easy to spot.
Tying into combat are the health and stamina systems and their various upgrades. Stamina is obviously how much you are fatigued by exercise such as sprinting and swinging a sledgehammer, every blow reduces your stamina bar which is only shown when being depleted. When your stamina bar is depleted you can no longer fight effectively, causing you to stop sprinting or stumble around, and when your stamina bar is completely gone zombies can also get in a few very effective cheap shots and send you flying. The health system is refreshingly old school, being a series of blocks arrayed at the top left of the screen portraying how much health your character retains. Health can be replenished by eating, drinking, and leveling up, although food choices are very sparse. Along the way you will find snack bars available in standard and extra format, fruit, and energy drinks, thats it, thats pretty much it in the way of interactive health products. I should also mention the "Fury" meter, essentially beat enough zombies and you can fly into a character specific rage. Whether it be a personal side arm, or an infinite stash of throwing knives, your fury will get you out of many a sticky situation.
The enemies are pretty basic for zombie games. Theres your standard Max Brook’s zombie, called a “walker”, that does just that, theres the fast plague zombies called “infected”, the “thug” or giant asshole as you will soon call him, the floater which might as well be a boomer from L4D, the “suicide” which is just a Dead Island version of a Creeper, the “Ram”, a slavering mental patient (pro tip: let him run past then head on in the back door), the “butcher” who has no hands so stabs you with the bones of his arms (pro tip: use an axe for added MLG score), and a guest appearance by the very much over used Jason Voorhees. The basic walker can be upgraded with weapons or a miasmic cloud of flies or for your gaming pleasure, set on fire; cause the only thing worse than a zombie is a flaming zombie. All enemies are introduced with a cut scene the first time you meet them and throughout the game you’ll acquire the ability to choose your path through the levels by what sounds you hear coming from certain paths. All enemies respond to you by your threat level and theres a strategy for all of them, most of which involve a machete enema or shoving a car down their throats, but do experiment.
Now that I’ve talked about everything out of order lets hit the plot. Essentially (based on what character you choose) you are sent to Banoi Island a beautiful resort, from there shit goes bad and you wake up in your bed to an emergency broadcast urging you to leave the hotel. Along the way you are guided by a man from the radio who (spoiler alert) eventually fucks you over and gets his ass beat, but I digress. From the first act you’ll be meeting and helping every bleeding heart survivor you should have fed to the horde, you’ll be collecting car parts and pharmaceuticals from the resort to the heart of the jungle and everyone has a weapon or new mod they will be willing to trade for services rendered. Long story short your merry band of immune survivors make it off the island via helicopter piloted by an “innocent” ex con. So military scandal and dead scientists aside the plot is simple but effective and still manages to provide a twist and turn hear or there.
Multiplayer is just the campaign with four players, theres no difference in number of enemies or plot and everything can be accomplished by one person, aside from fast travel and main quests you rarely have to be a group player.
Overall I was satisfied with the plot, the graphics are beautiful and I rarely encountered bugs until later in the game when I stumbled across enemies glitching into walls and had problems loading textures on start up. The combat can either be the most fun you’ve ever had while shoving a wrench into your girlfriends mouth or become the most frustrating thing you’ve ever attempted, it even says in the loading screen tips “some areas have a high threat level, it may be harder to play on your own”. One great thing that will make up for these bugs is the fact all the game data is stored on the disk, it even says on the case that it only needs 51mb of hard drive space which is uber small for such a huge and beautiful game, I recently picked up RAGE and right at the desk they warned me it would take an hour to install as it takes up 8gigs of hard drive space... So Dead Island, its a beautiful immersive world of zombies and other assorted a-holes, with a small number of glitches and racially styled characters, but its damn fun and with the chance to bring your weapons over to the next play through and start up from every chapter, its worth coming back but try it on your own before you get too attached to your brains....
*Just as an end note don't let my assorted pessimism and cynicism dissuade you from trying this game, I absolutely loved it and lost a lot of sleep from the insane amount of tension it builds, and in my defense its my job to find the bad in everything that is good. Let me also say this game did better than anyone thought it would, when I went to buy it three days after it was released I went to four different stores and they all told me it had sold out at least four times already, it makes me wish I had preordered it instead of Resistance 3, but I digress, get this game, get some friends and let the good times roll.
